Changes
So it's been quite a while since my last IR. Quite a while indeed.
Things have been Happening. My life is significantly different from how it was when I wrote Good Or Bad. Haven't been updating the site much. Thought I might as well go over the various ways in which my life has changed. Let you all in a bit.
Globally, the whole Iraq thing has started. All of a sudden I find myself interested in World Politics. I didn't particularly want to be interested in World Politics, always despised World Politics, but here I am.
As I am a denizen of this fine World Wide Web and an easily influenced creature of Media, I find myself tilting ever leftwards. (I hate to use "left" and "right" in discussions of politics, but it does simplify.) The evidence and reasoning for a war in Iraq are simply nonexistant. Bush is doing something bad, and he's doing it virtually alone. Glad to be Canadian, folks. Glad to be Canadian.
I try to be open-minded, though. I still read Mallard Fillmore and Under The Lemon Tree religiously. I am (as everyone is) swayed by what I read-- it is my responsibility to ensure that I get a balanced diet.
It's not like Saddam isn't a bad guy. It's not like I wouldn't love to see him toppled. I read about the whole Kurd thing. Ethnic cleansing. Not cool. Saddam needs to be overthrown. I just don't think Bush is justified, in political terms, in doing so.
I can't understand why assassinations are so wrong. I mean, sure, I know why world leaders discourage them. But would a war that will result in thousands of casualties really be morally preferable to a quick end with a vial of nicotine? It's not that hard. You don't even have to use a government agency, as such, to do it.
Saddam is the target, right? This'll all be over when he's gone, right? It's the problem of a single dictator, right? The system itself isn't flawed, right?
Anyway.
Hard not to fall into outright anti-Americanism these days, especially as I read more and more about their various misdeeds of days gone by. Don't get me wrong, I love Americans. I just think their corrupt oligarchy needs a slap upside the head.
I love one American in particular.
Yes, ladies and gentlemen-- big Change here-- I have somehow obtained a girlfriend. 1/0 has fulfilled its primary purpose. Woohoo.
Her name is Amber "Miss Mab" Panyko (you may have heard of her) and she's from Indiana. A hoosier, or whatever it is they call themselves. Go figure.
Yes, it is primarily an online relationship; but yes, we have visited. It's hard, when you're both in college. Little spare time or cash. That's not the main difficulty, though.
She's not a Christian.
I like to think she's close. I like to think she's spiritually aware (and she is). But the fact of the matter is-- the woman I love does not, at this time, recognize Jesus Christ as her personal Lord and Saviour. I'd be lying if I said I was okay with this. But hey, I'm not going to leave her over it. That won't help.
Mom doesn't like it. If my imaginary nineteen-year-old-self were looking down at me, he certainly wouldn't approve. But hey, I've never been one to listen to reason.
I do have a job. Sorta.
It's a co-op thing with the college. I'm working for Kellogg's.
I know. Kellogg's. What the heck.
I have discovered Work Ethic, and the dangerous consequences of a lack thereof. I have an incredible propensity for staring into space and thinking about nothing. It borders on the superhuman.
Still, it is nice to work for a paycheque for once in my life. Fulfilling, you might say. If time-consuming.
Oddly enough, I do think it was The Iraqi Shuffle that got me the job, though I don't believe my employers ever actually saw it.
1/0 is focussing more and more on its impending end, although I still have months to go. At this rate, it should end in late May. I do know what I want to do afterwards, but I still haven't lined up the webspace. I don't want to use Keenspace anymore. They're a nice incubating stage for larval cartoonists, but it's time for me to go.
I am particularly nonplussed at the way they advertized their new pay service while their free service was "malfunctioning". Far be it from me to look a gift horse in the mouth, though.
Email ebbs and flows, and right now it's ebbing again. (Of course, as I say this, it'll probably trigger a flow. Damn you all. Though email surges generally coincide with Paypal donations, and I do like those.)
I have taken an interest in Fark and Everything2.
I'm still reading entirely too many online comics.
I'm not getting enough sleep.
I hardly ever listen to music anymore.
Oh, and my father died.
Yes, that's by far the biggest change. Dad has finally lost his lifelong battle with illness. Or won, you might say. Either way, he's six feet under.
My Dad was unquestionably my biggest role model. He is a great man who lived a great life. He is a good father and a good husband. I want to be more like him.
Unfortunately, he's left quite the mess behind, as must all dying fathers. My sister is falling into typical teenage delinquency. Mom is descending into a rather sad widowhood. I still haven't cried. I don't know why.
It's not like I don't cry. I'm a crier. I think I may be channelling all that into my newfound passion for politics. I don't know.
Wow, this is really personal stuff. But then, I never did have tact. Please, spare me your sympathy emails. I really don't want to have to go through them like a robot, saying "thanks, but I'm okay" to each one.
It's weird, the stuff you find out when you start paying attention to news. Bananas are in danger of extinction. Some guy vandalized the Sydney Opera House. Trees are now recognized as a major source of air pollution. The FTAA allowed an American gas company to sue the Canadian government for banning a carcinogen. The PM of Serbia-Montenegro (former Yugoslavia) was shot to death, and he was a pretty cool guy.
The more you read, the more you freak out. Add to that the terrible uncertainty of it all (I'm not believing everything I read, folks) and it's a recipe for a major mindtrip.
Or, again, maybe I'm in denial. Maybe I'm sublimating. Maybe I have too much spare time, or not enough. Maybe I'm just an information addict.
The latter is most probable.
Anyway, things are changing. Things have changed. And I think there's no better way to indicate that than by not ending this Rambling with three summary points. I trust you've all been taking notes.